I made this as a distraction <3

almost attempted TWICE last week

i literally dont wanna be here anymore

skibidiahh

we kissed

3 times

but then I told him I cant kiss him no more unless we date but I already knew he needed time and told him why I cant and he was super understanding I love him

i was hanging out w the boy today

and I've been wearing shorts

right

i looked at my legs

you can see the scar from when I cut my ex-gfs initial into my thigh and put a heart around it

Anyways-

New crush, he's sweet and keeps flirting back. He knows I selfharm, he doesnt like that I do it or neccesaeily understand but 🤷‍♀️

A little bit over a month clean, and I've started struggling with urges of selfharm recently.

Its hard, to go to school and function normally and have this stupid little voice whispering things.

Bad things.

Its hard, when those bad things start to really hurt and cut deep, and all I want is for them to physically cut deep.

zeeeero days clean 😋😋

hi sillies!!!

happy one year anniversary in kitty heaven to my best friend Milo!!! I miss you sweet boy, i miss your smell,and the softness of your fur, i miss brushing you and giving you kitty yogurt.

i miss feeding you under the table and i miss you giving me kisses. i miss your rumbly old man purr, i miss you giving me new "hairstyles". 

i miss you so much and didn't think it hurt anymore, but it does.

we miss you.

i hope you found a real girlfriend in kitty heaven, because let me tell you that skunk was not it.

i hope you found more kitty friends, cuz Jazzy kept looking for you. Did you say goodbye to her?

Do you watch me? Us?

I know you do. I feel you with me sometimes.

Keep bugging grandma, i know she misses you even if she won't admit it.

i hope you forgive me for losing my necklace, and for sobbing like a baby.

Pay Auntie Kristen a visit, I know she misses you so much.

I miss you more.

If we had tuna I'd eat it like I did when you died, and on your birthday. I'm sad we don't.

I love you so fluffing much, tell Fruitloops I say hi if you can. I miss her too. And Grammy Hammy. And Omi. Please.

-Your bestest friend ever.

anyways gonna ask my mom to take me to walmart sometime this week to get a binder

and 

my dad's gf put a bible pamphlet in my room knowing im a satanist athiest

also, the urge to cut is insane.

uhm so

hi. *sings toxic gossip train/j*

my whole life is a wreck rn

my dad didnt do jack shit for my bday

my bus/ car ride sched as of right now makes it so I can literally only see my gf 4/5 days

but ocassionally it's 3/5 for her meetings

and then once my club starts it'll always be 3/5, then get lowered to 2/5 for her occasional meetings.

its whatever ig 

I have a solo.to for my therian acc (and all related) if anyone wants to see.                        click here 👇                           start of link https://solo.to/clov3rxx end of link

also I js found out I have NO classes w my friends so thats great